011129
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In a small town in Tennessee, Big Bubba decides it's time for his son, 14 year old Billy Bob, to learn the facts of life. He takes him to the local house of ill repute, which is fronted by a beauty parlour. Bubba introduces Billy Bob to the madam and explains that it's time for his indoctrination to sex.
The madam says, "Bubba you've been such a good customer over the years, I'm going to see to this personally." So the madam takes Billy Bob by the hand and leads him upstairs where she completes his deflowering.
Later, as they are walking downstairs, the madam says, "Since this is your first time, I'm going to see that you get the full treatment before you leave, I'm going to give you a manicure."
Two weeks later Bubba and Billy Bob run into the madam on the main street. Billy Bob is acting a little shy, so the madam smiles and says, "Well, Billy Bob, don't you remember me?"
"Yes ma'am the boy stammers, "You're the lady that gave me the crabs and then cut off my fingernails so I couldn't scratch 'em."
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Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? A: 45 mins.
Q: What is it when a man talks nasty to a woman? A: Sexual Harassment.
Q: What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man? A: $3.99 a minute.
Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead? A: The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.
Q: How can you tell if your husband is dead? A: The sex is the same, but you get the remote.
Q: What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme? A: Humpme Dumpme
Q: What have men and floor tiles have in common? A: If you lay them properly the first time, you can walk all over them for life.
Q: Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A: Because those men already have boyfriends.
Q: What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A: After a year the dog is still excited to see you.
Q: What do you call a smart blonde? A: A golden retriever.
Q: What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A: A battery has a positive side.
Q: Do you know the punishment for bigamy? A: Two mothers-in-law.
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