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020628 - ***** 20 NEW funny pix - www.solstikkan.has.it *****
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President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar.

A guy walks in and asks the barman, "Isn't that Bush and Powell sitting over there?"
The barman says, "Yep, that's them,".

So the guy walks over and says, "Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?"

Bush says, "We're planning WW III ". And the guy says, "Really? What's going to happen?"

Bush says, "Well, we're going to kill 140 million Iraqis this time and one blonde with big breasts."

The guy exclaimed, "A blonde with big breasts? Why kill a blonde with big breasts?

Bush turns to Powell, punches him on the shoulder and says,
"See, smart ass?! I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis!"
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My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so she took it to the
veterinarian.
He found the problem was hair in its ears and cleaned both ears and the
dog could hear fine.
The vet told the lady if she wanted to keep this from re-occurring she
should go to the store and get some "Nair" hair remove and rub in its
ears once a month.

The lady goes to the drug store and gets some "Nair" hair remover.
At the register the druggist tells her "If you're going to use this
under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days."
The lady says "I'm not using it under my arms."

The druggist says "If you're using it on your legs don't shave for a
couple of days."
The lady says "I'm not using it on my legs either and if you must know
I'm using it on my schnauzer."

The druggist says "Then stay off your bicycle for a week."
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The long term implications of drugs/procedures must be fully considered:
"Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's Disease research, it is believed that by the year 2030 there will be a large number of people wandering around with huge breasts and erections who can't remember
what to do with them"...
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A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant that read "Unique Breakfast" so he walked in and sat down.
The waitress brought him his coffee and asked him what he wanted.

"What's your Unique Breakfast?" he asked inquisitively.

"Baked tongue of chicken!" she proudly replied.

"Baked tongue of chicken?... baked tongue of chicken! Do you have any idea how disgusting that is? I would never even consider eating anything that came out of a chicken's mouth!" he fumed.

Undaunted, the waitress asked, "What would you like then?"

"Just bring me some scrambled eggs," the man replied.
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A blonde and a redhead met in a bar after work for a drink, and were watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge.
The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump,
and the redhead replied, "I'll take that bet!" Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owed.
The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend." The blonde said, "No. A bet's a bet. You won the money."
So the redhead said, "Listen, I have to admit, I saw this on the 5 o'clock news, so I can't take your money."
The blonde replied, . . .
"Well, so did I, but I never thought he'd jump again!"
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Statistical Findings:
10% of the women had sex within the first hour of their first date
20% of the men had sex in a non-traditional place
36% of the women favour nudity
45% of the women prefer dark men with blue eyes
46% of the women experienced anal sex
70% of the women prefer sex in the morning
80% of the men have never experienced homosexual relations
90% of the women would like to have sex in the forest
99% of the women have never experienced sex in the office.
Conclusion:
Statistically speaking, you have a better chance of having anal sex in
the morning with a strange woman in the forest than to have sex in the
office at the end of the day.
Moral:
Do not stay late in the office. Nothing good will ever come of it!
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