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020705 - new daily pix at www.solstikkan.has.it *********
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How can you tell if you're in a lesbian bar?
Even the pool table doesn't have any balls.
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Two 80 year old geezers are driving down the road when they hear the Ex-Lax commercial end with the statement: "It makes you feel young again."

John looks at Sylvester and says, "We need to pull over and get a bottle of that stuff!"

Sylvester agrees and the two old geezers pull over and get a bottle of Ex-Lax. They both take two tablespoons each and continue to drive.

About one mile later Sylvester asks, "Well John, do you feel young yet?"

"No," replies John.

So they pull over and take four more tablespoons a piece and continue to drive down the road.

A couple of miles later, Sylvester asks, "John, do you feel younger?"

"No," replies John, "but I sure did a childish thing!"
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Mrs. Jones had a feeling that her husband was cheating on her so she got two of the kids from next door to spy on him and see if he was cheating on her.

The two boys climbed up a tree and looked onto Mrs. Jones's bedroom window and saw Mr. Jones having sex with Miss Smith and went back and told Mrs. Jones what they saw.

It happened three times in one week which upset Mrs. Jones, so she filed for divorce.

While in court the judge asked if Mrs. Jones had any witnesses, to which she replied, "Yes, two boys from next door."

The judge asked one of the boys to explain what he saw.

He said, "Judge, I climbed up in the tree and saw Miss Smith and Mr. Jones take off all there clothes and started f-ck-in."

With that the Judge got upset and said, "You can't use that language in this court," and thru him out.

When he asked the second boy to explain what he saw, he told him to explain to him without using the bad language.

"Well, Judge," he said, "there was Mr. Jones and Miss Smith in the bedroom, and they took off all their clothes. There was ten toes up and ten toes down, Two big asses going round and round, meat fly in and meat fly out, If that ain't f-ck-in you can kick me out!"
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On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said,
"If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers.'
A little voice from the back of the room asked,
'How the f-ck will that help?"
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Three buddies decided to take their wives on vacation for a week in Las Vegas. The week flew by & they all had a great time. After they returned home & the men went back to work, they sat around at break & discussed their vacation.

The first guy says " I don't think I'll ever do that again! Ever since we got back, my old lady flings her arms & hollers 7 come 11 all night & I haven't had a wink of sleep!"

The second guy says " I know what you mean...my old lady played blackjack the whole time we were there & she slaps the bed all night and hollers hit me or hit me hard & I haven't had a wink of sleep either!"

The third guy says " You guys think you have it bad! ...my old lady played the slots the whole time we were there & I wake up each morning with a sore dick & an ass full of quarters.
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On the first day of third grade, Miss Torch took roll call.
"My name is Johnny F-ckhauer," said one boy.
"I won't tolerate such language in my class", Miss Torch fumed. "Tell
me your real name."
"That is my real name," Johnny insisted. "You can ask my brother over
in the fourth grade."
The determined teacher marched across the hall. "Do you have a
F-ckhauer in here?" Miss Torch asked the class.
"Hell no," a bold lad retorted. "We don't even get a cookie break!"
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