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021027 - more jokes @ www.solstikkan.has.it ...... :-)
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I've learned - that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better have a big dick or huge tits.
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At a Gynecologist convention in Switzerland two gynecologists were talking.
One from France says "There was a woman in my office yesterday with a clitoris like a watermelon."
Another one from England says, "That's impossible, if she had a clitoris the size of a watermelon she couldn't walk." The one from France responded,
"You English, always thinking about size. I was talking about taste."
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While inspecting their honeymoon hotel room the bride discovered a
little box attached to the bed. "What's this for?" she asked her husband.
"If you put a quarter in," he answered, reaching into his pocket,"the bed starts vibrating."
"Save your money," she said. "When you're a quarter in, I start vibrating!"
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Two little boys go into the grocery store. One is nine-years-old and the other one is four-years-old. The nine-year-old grabs a box of
tampons from the shelf and carries it to the register for check-out.
The cashier asks "Oh, these must be for your mom, huh?"
The nine-year-old replies "Nope, not for my mom."
Without thinking, the cashier responded "Well, they must be for your sister then?"
The nine-year-old quipped, "Nope, not for my sister either."
The cashier had now become curious and says, "Oh, not for your mom and not for your sister? Who are they for?"
The nine-year-old says "They're for my four-year-old little brother."
The cashier is surprised "Your four-year-old little brother??"
The nine-year-old explains, "Yeah, they say on TV if you wear one of
these, you can swim or ride a bike, and my little brother can't do
either of them!"
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A fellow picked up a girl in a bar and after a few drinks they went home together.
After some more drinking and talking, they got undressed and climbed into bed.
After a few minutes of making love, the girl started laughing.
The fellow asked her, "What's so funny?"
"Your organ," she chortled. "It's a bit on the small side!"
He shot back acidly, "Well, it's not used to playing in cathedrals."
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What is the blonde's favorite battery?
Ever-ready.
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Giuseppi walks into work, and he says, "Ey, Tony! You know who's-a George Washington?"
Tony says, "No, Giuseppi, who's-a George Washington?"
He says, "Hah! George-a Washington's the first-a President of- a United States. I'm-a go to night school, learn all about-a United States, and become-a U.S.-a citizen."
A couple of days later, Giuseppi walks into work and says.
"Ey, Tony, you know who's-a Abraham Lincoln?"
Tony says, "No, Giuseppi, who's-a Abraham Lincoln?"
He says, "Hah! Abaham-a Lincoln is-a sixteenth President of-a the United States. I'm-a go to night school, learn all about-a United States, and become-a U.S.-a citizen."
A guy in the back of the shop yells, "Yo, Giuseppi . . . you know
who Fishlips Lorenzo is?"
He says, "No. Who's-a Fishlips Lorenzo is?"
The guy yells, "That's the guy who's bangin' your wife while you're in night school."
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