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021126 --- !!! new video clips @ www.panda-sonic.has.it !!!
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There are two kinds of sex - the kind you pay for and the kind you get for free. The kind you pay for will always be cheaper than the kind you get for free.
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021126 --- !!! new shoe mc @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!!
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A young couple had just returned from their honeymoon and were settling down in their new apartment. Coming home from work one night, the landlady met the man in the hallway. She said, "I have a couple of extra tickets to a play in town tonight, and I wonder if you and your bride would like to have them?"

"I'll ask her," the young man responded. He opened his door and called out, "Honey, would you like to see 'Oliver Twist' tonight?"

"Hey, Pal," she retorted. "If you show me one more trick with that thing, I'm going home to mother."
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I may not be totally perfect, but some parts are pretty good.
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A man walks into a sperm bank and declares, "I'm of royal blood and an I.Q. of 165, I'd like to make a donation". The nurse gives him a sealed cup and directs him to a provate room. 20 minutes later the man hasn't come out, the nurse knocks on the door. "Is there a problem?"

"I'm so embarrassed, I used my right hand. I used my left hand. I poured cold water on it and hot water on it. Could you help me?"

The nurse replied, "I don't usually do this but you are kinda cute..."

She gets on her knees and begins to blow him.

"I really appreciate this, but I need help getting the cap off the jar!"
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A guy applied to join a nudist club. "Exactly what do you do here?" he asked. "It's quite simple," said the club secretary, "we take off all our clothes and commune with nature."
"Cool," said the guy, "...count me in!!!"
So he paid his membership fee, took off his gear and strolled off.
As he walked along a path, he saw a big sign which read, "Beware of Gays."
A little further along he saw another sign which read the same thing "Beware of Gays."
He continued walking until he came to a small clearing which had a bronze plaque set in the ground. He bent over to read the plaque and it
said, "Sorry,... You've had two warnings!"
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How are husbands like lawn mowers?
They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.
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A priest and a rabbi walked into a bar. After sitting down, ordering, and some chit chat the priest said,
"Have you noticed there are no women in this bar?" He then realized the
truth, "I think we're in a gay bar."
A man approached and tried to flirt with the priest. The priest was dumbfounded, and didn't know what to do. The rabbi leaned over and whispered something in the man's ear.
The man nodded and walked off. The relieved priest said, "Thanks. What did you tell him?" The rabbi replied, "I just told him we're on our honeymoon."
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This blonde is driving down the road when, her car breaks down on the Interstate, so the driver eases it over onto the shoulder. She carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk. Out jump two men in trench coats, who walk to the rear of the vehicle where they stand facing oncoming traffic and begin opening their coats and exposing themselves to approaching drivers.
Not surprisingly, one of the worst pile-ups in history of this highway
occurs.
It's not very long before a police car shows up. The cop, clearly enraged, runs toward the driver of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What
the devil is going on here?"
"My car broke down," says the lady calmly. "Well, what are these perverts doing here by the road?" screams the cop. "Those are my emergency flashers!" replied the blonde!
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Sadie and Esther, two elderly widows, are sitting, people-watching, in a Catskill hotel lobby.
"You know, " says Sadie, "I've been reading this "'Sex and Marriage' book and all they talk about is mutual orgasm; mutual orgasm here, mutual orgasm there, that's all they talk about.
Tell me, Esther, when your husband was alive, did you ever have mutual orgasm?
"No," says Ester, "I think we had Allstate."
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Standing at the edge of the lake, a man saw a woman flailing about in the