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021222 - !! todays pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!
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"What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?
Marilyn Pittman.
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A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
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A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around.
Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him.

"Pardon me," she said, "I'm sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look just like my son, who just died recently."

"I'm very sorry," replied the young man, "is there anything I can do for you?"

"Yes," she said, "As I'm leaving, can you say 'Good bye, Mother!' ?
It would make me feel so much better."

"Sure," answered the young man. As the old woman was leaving, he called
out, "Goodbye, Mother!" As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he
saw that his total was $127.50.

"How can that be?" he asked, "I only purchased a few things!"

"Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk.
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Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same."
Oscar Wilde.
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Joe was in the corner bar having a few when his friend Phil cropped in and joined him. It didn't take long for Phil to notice a string hanging out of the back of Joe's shirt collar that his friend kept tugging on.

Finally Phil couldn't contain his curiousity, and asked, "What the hell's that string for?"

"Two weeks ago I had a date with that dish, Linda," Joe explained, "and when I got her into the sack, would you believe I couldn't perform? Made me so mad that I tied this string to my dick, and every time I think of how it let me down, I pull the string and make it kiss my ass."
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Love your neighbor, but don't get caught.
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Three blondes had just bought a can of Pepsi One and were anxious to try it for the first time.

So the first blonde opens the can, the second blonde pours it into three glasses.

The third blonde eyes the three glasses suspiciously and says "I wonder which one has the calorie?"
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A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father.
She stands next to the barber chair, eating a snack cake while her dad gets his hair cut.

The barber smiles at her and says, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on you're twinkie".

I know", she replies. "I'M GONNA GET BOOBS TOO".
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"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would
be dead."
Johnny Carson.
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Little Johnny is at the zoo on a school visit and he spots a deer.
Being a city kid he's never seen one before and so he asks his teacher,
"What's that, Miss Jones?"
Miss Jones decides to play a word game with him and says, "That's what your Mom calls your Dad, Johnny."
Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "I'm not stupid Miss Jones, I know that ain't a frickin' pig!"
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021222 - !! todays pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!
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