===============================================================
020829 - !!!! 21 new pix at www.solstikkan.has.it !!!!!!
=================================================================
What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
Not enough sand.
================================================================
When lawyers die, why are they buried in a hole 36 feet deep?
Because down deep, they are all nice guys!
===============================================================
Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1970:
A logger exchanges a set "L" of lumber for a set "M" of money. The
cardinality of set "M" is 100. Each element is worth one dollar. Make
100 dots representing the elements of the set "M." The set "C", the
cost of production contains 20 fewer points than set "M." Represent the
set "C" as a subset of set "M" and answer the following question: What
is the cardinality of the set "P" of profits?

Teaching Math in 1980:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.

Teaching Math in 1990:
By cutting down beautiful forest trees, the logger makes $20. What do
you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation
after answering the question: How did the forest birds and squirrels
"feel" as the logger cut down the trees? There are no wrong answers.

Teaching Math in 2002:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is $120. How does Arthur Andersen determine that his profit margin is
$60?

Teaching Math in 2010:
El hachero vende un camion carga por $100. La cuesta de production
es.............
=================================================================
This guy had a very attractive wife, who was always wanting clothes, jewelry, etc., but he was not too well off.
One day his wife came home with a diamond necklace.
The guy asked: "Where did you get that?"
His wife replied: "I won it at bingo."
The next night she came home with a mink coat.
The guy asked: "Where did you get that?"
His wife replied: "I won it at bingo."
The next night she came home with a Mercedes Benz.
The guy asked: "Where did you get that?"
His wife replied: "Look!! Don't keep asking where I get my things!! Go upstairs and run my bath for me!!"
His wife came upstairs to find a small amount of water in the tub. The wife asked: "How come you put so little water in the tub?"
The guy replied: "I didn't want you to get your bingo card wet."
================================================================
One Friday night a man tells his wife that he is going duck hunting
in the morning.
She says, "I want to go too."
He says, "NO... You are too hard to wake up."
She begged him, "Please, Please. I promise I will wake up early."
He says, "O.K. but if you wont get up, I'm going to screw you up
the ass or you are going to give me a blow job."
She said, "I've got nothing to worry about because I will wake up."
3:00am the next morning the alarm goes off. The man gets up and tries
to wake up his wife. She's still laying there and he tells her that
he is going to take a shower and when he gets out she'd better be up.
He gets out of the shower and she is still sleeping. He tells her he
is going to give her one more chance to wake up. He has to go out and
get their stuff and put the dogs in the truck and when he comes back
in she has to be awake or she has to pay up. He's out there about
30 minutes and when he comes back in his wife is snoring.
He is pissed. He wakes her up.

He said, "OK now whats it going to be? In the ass or a blow job?"

She said, "all right... I can't take in the ass so I will give you a
blow job."

He pulls out his cock and she starts sucking on it.

Then she begins to spit and spit. She says, "THAT TASTES LIKE SHIT!!!"

He said, "Yeah, I know, the dogs didn't want to wake up either."
=================================================================
A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist.
Blonde, "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that
they can never reach me."
Psychiatrist, "Don't you have a phone in your car?"
Blonde, "That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car."
Psychiatrist, "Uh ... How's that working?"
Blonde, "Actually, I haven't gotten any letters yet."
Psychiatrist, "And why do you think that is?"
Blonde, "I figure its because when I'm driving around, my zip code keeps changing."
================================================================
ACTUAL LETTERS SENT TO LANDLORDS

1. "The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is
cleared."

2. "Will you please send someone to mend our cracked sidewalk.
Yesterday my wife tripped on it and is now pregnant."

3. "I want some repairs done to my stove as it has backfired and burnt
my nob off."

4. "This is to let you know that there is a smell coming from the man
next door."

5. "I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from the
wall."

6. "I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen."

7. "Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces."

8. "When the workmen were here they put their tools in my wife's new
drawers and made a mess. Please send men with clean tools to finish the
job and keep my wife happy."
=================================================================