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021010 - !!! 21 new pix on www.solstikkan.has.it !!!!
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Why do women close their eyes during sex ?
They can't stand seeing a man have a good time.
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Any married man should forget his mistakes.
There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.
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There was the hillbilly woman who came to the hospital to have her first child. A year later she was back for a second child. The next year, almost like clockwork, she was back for her third child.
The hospital staff naturally began to expect her, and she was there, just like clockwork.
In the twelfth year - she didn't show, and the staff wondered what
happened...A couple of years later she shows up, but she's not
pregnant.
The hospital staff wonder what happened - did her husband die, or what?
When asked why she hadn't been there having a baby the past couple of
years, she replied "No, no more. Found out what was causin' it."
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The most thoroughly wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed.
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A woman goes into the doctor because she's missed a couple of periods and takes a test, revealing she's pregnant. So she goes into the doctor to confirm the results, and finds out she's about 3 1/2 months pregnant.
"Hmmmm." she says "Is this not good news?" He says to her.
"No, not necessarily.. The problem is that I've been with 5 different guys in the past 4 months, I have no idea who the father could be!"
"Well, it looks as though you may want to contact each of them and have them come in for DNA testing. Then you'll know for sure." Said the Doc.
"I can't do that." She says.
"Why not?" The Doctor replies.
"Because, they've changed their Screen Names!
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What's the definition of a computer nerd?
A man who knows 4,560 ways to have sex, but doesn't know any girls.
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Three engineering students were discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It had to be a mechanical engineer, look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it had to be an electrical engineer, the nervous system is just a marvel of millions of electrical connections."
The third said, "Actually, it was a civil engineer.
Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline right through a recreational
area?"
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A guy enters a bank to see about getting a business loan.
"What kind of business do you want to start?" asks the bank manager.
"I have some black powder. You sprinkle it on a women's vagina and it makes it taste like a peach."
"I don't think we can give you a loan," was the reply so the guy left.
A few months later he went into the bank with a wheel barrel filled with money.
The same bank manager came up to him and asked: "Congratulations, I guess that idea for black powder really paid off."
"Nah, that didn't go anywhere. I made my money with this white powder."
"Really," replied the bank manager. "What does it do?"
"Give me a peach and I'll show you."
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A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
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A blonde, worried about the HIV crisis, walks into a drugstore and purchases a pack of condoms.
"That will be $1.08, please," says the clerk.
"What's the 8 cents for?" asks the blonde. "It says one dollar right here on the packaging."
"Tax," replies the clerk.
"Gee", says the blonde, "I thought you just rolled them on and they stayed there. Tacking them could be painful."
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What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
Her ankles.
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A boy is at school and he hears the older kids talking about pussy, and their bitch. The boy confused by this goes to his mother. "Mom", the boy asks, "What's a pussy?"
The mother being startled by this thinks quick and finds the closest
dictionary and opens it up to a picture of a cat and says "Son, that is a pussy." the son then asks
"What's a bitch?"
The mother again thinking quickly opens to a picture of a dog and says
"Son, this is a bitch."
The son walks away still confused, and sees his father watching
television. The son walks up to his father and says "Dad, what's a pussy?"
The father doesn't want to miss the baseball
game so he quickly whips out his Penthouse magazine to the centerfold,
grabs a marker and draws a circle around the vagina and says "Son, this
is a pussy!"
The son, now starting to understand what the older boys are talking
about asks "Then, what is a bitch?"
The dad replies, "That's everything outside the circle!"
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What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?
"Have another beer."
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